Lorna was only 18 years old when she moved to California in the heat of the wildfires. She’s been there for the past four years, studying towards an Acting degree and exploring the world of film, TV, the stage and commercials. Recently, she created and acted in her own short film, shooting a ten page script in ten hours. Below she tells the story of how she traded her insecurities for self-confidence, and pushed past barriers in pursuit of her dream.
I’ve always had far reaching dreams, without much natural courage. Growing up a shy child, with a heart aching to create at any given moment, was an interesting thing to navigate. I’ve always had a draw towards acting, stories and humanity. Throughout secondary school I became braver, slowly moving forward from just acting or dancing in the back row.
As I approached the end of my time at school, I decided to follow my heart’s desire and chose to study acting at University. In early 2020, at the outbreak of Covid, I auditioned remotely and got a place at a small acting school in Northern California. It was ‘go big or go home’ for me. I knew I needed to live somewhere where I didn’t fit in culturally and somewhere my skin could grow a little thicker. Miraculously and with perfect timing the doors opened. My student Visa was granted in the summer and within two weeks I had left this little island and stepped foot in America, right in the middle of the pandemic, and wildfires.
My degree programme was an intense three years. It was the most uncomfortable but most marvellous thing I’ve done. I quickly realised how to take ownership of my craft and make the course my own. Most of my classmates were in their late 20’s/early 30’s, so collaborating with them meant I had to be on their level in so many ways. The most important take-aways from my time training were that it is important to surround yourself with passionate and kind people, to never suppress your imagination and to really delight in what you do. Above all to desire mastering it because this drive will sustain you.
Living with the conditions of a Visa, not being able to work, and figuring out adulthood in a completely foreign place was a big stretch. But as a storyteller, these difficult seasons are the things we get to use as food for what we create next. In my fourth year of living in the United States, I was accepted onto the Optional Practical Training Programme (OPT) which allowed me to extend my student visa to work there as long as employment pertained to my degree. During that year I managed to have a handful of acting opportunities in film, TV, stage and a commercial. I was able to have experience in film sets and local theatre, essentially dipping into different crew roles and learning the ropes. I really appreciated these moments as they allowed me to grasp a more holistic understanding of the process and the hard work required to make a film or play happen. The most crew experience I acquired was in the wardrobe department where I was able to source the costume, fit out the actors and help them feel comfortable, whilst keeping track of what they had to wear depending upon the ‘story day’. For most of the year, I worked in the Film Commission office for Upstate California and was able to learn the logistics behind film and how important making healthy connections with your community is in the film industry.
One of my ‘far-reaching dreams’ from last year was to make a short film by the end of my time in America. The impression I get is that a lot of actors tend to feel powerless in their career and I’ve always struggled with thinking I may end up feeling the same way. Heading up a film project myself felt like a great way for my friends and I to grow in our creativity and to create an opportunity for ourselves. A friend and I came up with a concept and started planning. Bear in mind that neither of us had done this before. The main theme in our story revolves around drug abuse and the enormous strain that it puts on relationships. The area I lived in, in California, is one heavily impacted by this. The plot focuses on a young girl, Anna who is approaching the penalty of three DUIs as a consequence of a medically induced drug addiction. In the story she is preparing for court with her lawyer, Jillian. She encourages Anna to find peace by fleeing her circumstances as rapidly as possible. However, we discover they are both in need of the same healing and escape from their past, despite one being more transparent than the other. In developing this story and concept, we decided we wanted something that enabled people to reflect and realise how alike we are in our ‘messiness’, despite how often we judge others for the decisions and actions they take.
I took the initiative to write the first draft as I was encouraged by my friend to take on this challenge. After writing it, receiving notes and editing it, we looked through it together and made changes. We decided to call it ‘Through Her Teeth’ playing with the phrase ‘lying through your teeth’ that hints to some of our themes of hypocrisy and dishonesty in the film. We also recognised the imagery that could be linked with taking drugs or smoking in this particular title, so it seemed to capture the story well in multiple ways. Another friend, who is a wonderful director, called and without hesitation agreed to fly from the East Coast to direct it. Somehow, we managed to rally an extremely talented group of creatives together that wanted to join us in making this last minute project. As I edited the script, produced and prepared to act as my character, I just wanted to keep unpicking my own writing, my own character, and build a more interesting and believable story. This was the first complete project I’d ever written and I couldn’t believe people backed it, especially as I’d written off writing as something I’d ever succeed in. We filmed four days before I left the United States, shooting a 10 page script in 10 hours. Our crew worked with excellence and efficiency (as this should’ve taken three days to film). We’re hoping to submit this work to film festivals and see where it can go from there! The whole process demystified film for me. It showed me that film is really ‘at the end of one’s fingertips’ so long as we have the vision and passionate people who want to help, and make it their own too – the foundation of a project. We hope to finish it by the end of the summer. The link to the film will be posted on our IMDB page ‘Through Her Teeth’ (Short) once it’s completed.
I wish I could tell my 13 year old self that the things I was so insecure about weren’t going to hinder me. Struggling with learning difficulties growing up was a big pushback in having belief that I’d ever be able to work well with text. I strongly believe that the entrepreneurial mindset in American culture has given me what I’ve needed to build courage and self belief. I am so grateful I had the opportunity to meet the people I have met, and face so many character strengthening trials. A friend taught me that often we’re waiting for a ‘yes!’, for a qualification, for everything to be perfectly in order before we act on our dreams…but it’s rare that we are ever fully qualified. I feel I owe this dedication to my younger self (who never for a second thought she would actually do something that required so much bravery). I had a friend who said a couple of years ago, “I think you keep acting because you love the challenge” and this is so true.
I’m so excited to tell stories about ‘the gold in the rubble’, hope, restoration and redemption; exploring the lives of normal people who have courage to continue in a world that is too often unforgiving. Stories in different art forms have been what have challenged me and emboldened me above anything else in my journey. I hope they will do for you too.
